theme

cryforce:

thewriterkid:

Fun things to say when someone tells you they’re going to go to the bathroom:

  • Stay safe
  • Congratulations
  • That’s what they all say
  • Different strokes for different folks
  • I hope you have the time of your life
  • But you have so much to live for
  • Please explain
  • think of me
13 minutes ago  •  394659  •  via  •  source

just-laff:

never throw me anything unless you’re ok with it dropping

15 minutes ago  •  342301  •  via  •  source

pattylomein:

gallifrey-feels:

zzazu:

britney2007spears:

joebarborak:

thepurdypurdy:

THIS PHOTO WAS TAKEN LAST WEEK AT MY LOCAL KMART. YES, THAT IS A SEALED VHS TAPE OF JIMMY NEUTRON THE MOVIE, IN 2014, AT KMART, SITTING NEXT TO DVDS AND BLU-RAYS, PRICED AT $8.99 

To give perspective, this film was released on VHS in 2002 and has been sitting unopened in a Kmart store for 12 years, longer than children now in middle school. 

Plain proof that no one does inventory or gives a shit at any Kmart anywhere. Someone could probably live in Kmart and have no one notice. 

In 2001, I did an experiment for school about the idea of living in a big-box store like this. I selected a busy 24hr Meijer, which is a midwest-only combination of Marts both K and Wal. I entered the store on a lovely friday afternoon, and didn’t leave the store until the following sunday evening. I read the entire magazine section, played all of the demos of the games in the electronics section, and beat minesweeper on my phone innumerable times. I ate at the pizza parlour they’d just installed, and slept on the display furniture. I wandered around the racks during the day, bored out of my skull. I considered buying frozen burritos and asking one of the employees if they had a breakroom where I could microwave them, but that felt like it wouldn’t truly answer the question if someone could live in a Meijer; I’d be using resources that weren’t public.

The only time I was ever asked if I needed any help was on sunday morning around 8am, and then it was only waking me up to ask me if I was drunk and had wandered in that night and fell asleep on their displays. I said, “no, I’m fine, I’m just trying this futon.” and was left alone.

The people that work there really don’t care.

u lived in a k-mart

This is the most magical thing I’ve ever had the privilege of reading

you deserve a book deal and a movie just for the phrase ‘marts both k and wal’ 

Magical

16 minutes ago  •  352522  •  via  •  source
baby: dd d dde..dd-da
dad: daddy? :)
baby: desu
dad: its a fucking weeb
17 minutes ago  •  35724  •  via  •  source
"I guess"
- I disagree with you but ill let you have this one because I don’t feel like debating anymore with your simple ass   (via slayr)
18 minutes ago  •  110143  •  via  •  source

paleredsunday:

Share a coke with dude bro

18 minutes ago  •  47638  •  via  •  source

un-leash-ing:

egberts:

*goes to a party and awkwardly follows friend around the entire time*

*goes to a family reunion and awkwardly follows mom around the entire time*
22 minutes ago  •  638066  •  via  •  source

flukeoffate:

gingahninjah:

sliced bread is the greatest thing since betty white

Reblogging for that comment

22 minutes ago  •  156493  •  via  •  source

vixyish:

wolverxne:

Freddy The Fox by: [Rob Lee]

Photographers note: "This brave fox wandered up on our porch. He's half cat, half dog, and all cute. When the fox first came for a visit we instantly named it "Freddy the Fox." But after we got to know it we found out Freddy is actually Frederica."

BABYYYYYY

(You can still call Frederica “Freddy”!)

24 minutes ago  •  40973  •  via  •  source

kanayahummel:

theperksofbeingdornish:

ohanameansfamily24:

-behindbars:

the-grand-highboob:

thusmylife:

b1ush:

condescendingchristian:

image

oh my god

As a person from California, this is 100% accurate

As a person from Michigan, this is 100% accurate

As a person from England I was so confused because I forgot you use the Fahrenheit system 

50 degrees in England 

100 degrees in England


 

I don’t know why I found the skeletons so funny, it’s almost like they’re dancing really sarcastically?

they’re british skeletons of course they’re dancing sarcastically. 

25 minutes ago  •  682499  •  via  •  source